Late start, full plate, probably way more than I can handle in one sitting. No problem. I’ll just save the leftovers and nuke ’em next week. Maybe I should start writing two columns a week.

Anyway, the signs of fall that started creeping onto the edges weeks ago are now everywhere. Soon the leaf-peepers will be clogging the highways and bringing fall revenue to our local economy. But similar to the Republicans in Tampa, the irate fella who phoned me noontime Sunday during a beautiful Labor Day Weekend back-lit at night by a seductive blue moon wanted to look back, not ahead. He was still steamed up by irritating summer signals lingering along the lower Deerfield River, where he, his wife and dog camped Thursday for an intended long weekend away from it all. At least, that’s what they hoped for; definitely not what they got.

It seems that the once-tranquil stretch of river between Bardwells Ferry and Stillwater ain’t what it used to be, a disheartening fact that many of us discovered long ago. I know the lower Deerfield well from years of hunting and fishing, and that picturesque gorge is stained throughout with my DNA dating back centuries, starting with the surname worn by the bridge and ferry. The last time I went there, many years ago, to a familiar spot saturated with pleasant fishing memories, I left prematurely and vowed in hot, spicy language never to return; way too much “activity” for me — as it turns out, the same type of annoying activity that necessitated the early exit by the man who called my home Sunday. The name on the caller ID was a blast from the distant past.

“I had to get out of there,” fumed the South Deerfield man and Whately native on the phone with hunter-orange anger. “Those people floating down the river are hard to take. I didn’t know who to call, then thought of you. After 3 o’clock Saturday afternoon, more than a hundred tubers came by riding anything that floats — inner tubes, cheap blow-up prizes from the fair, you name it. I even saw six or seven people having a gay ole time drinking, littering, throwing bottles into the river, off a blow-up queen mattress. No lie. I decided to pack up and leave before I punched someone and got myself into trouble. We were outnumbered. I just wanted to get my Lab out of there before he cut his foot. That riverbed is a freakin’ mess.”

Irritated, the man folded his tent, loaded it into his canoe and headed downstream for his car, which was parked in the riverside lot south and west of Stillwater Bridge. Before turning the final corner to where he could clearly see the entire Stillwater Bridge, he found a disturbing pile of trash that stoked his ire to a red-hot glow.

“There were inner tubes, deflated floating devices, bottles and cans and trash everywhere. It looked like an ugly, stinking dump. Take a ride down there if you don’t believe me and see it for yourself. I’m sure it’s still there. Who should I call to report it? It’s freakin’ disgusting.”

Our source spoke to many of the frolicking folks passing by in the water and described them as outsiders, “not from town,” many from the Springfield and Northampton area, others from Worcester and Rhode Island. The most common question he was asked was, “How far to Stillwater?” That’s where they said their buses were waiting. Apparently, the flotilla gang didn’t feel up to lugging their garbage up the bank to the buses, easier to leave it streamside for someone else to clean up. Pigs!

Honestly, I can’t imagine such unacceptable behavior by customers of trips supervised by our local whitewater companies, although the source — who I decided not to name — claims to often see the local companies’ vehicles parked at Stillwater. It seems more likely that the folks involved in the floating circus he encountered Friday and Saturday were holiday excursions organized far away. Still, the whitewater companies cannot claim zero culpability because there’s no denying they put our Deerfield River “on the map.”

The problem as I see it from this lofty perch along the trestle overlooking the Deerfield’s wild west bank is that the slobs who create the problems will be long gone by the time law-enforcement arrives determined to make a vindictive statement. The “violators” ultimately charged, convicted and made examples of will likely be victims of circumstance and undeserving of what they get. Local lollygaggers will probably be punished for the dirty deeds of outsiders.

“It’s out of control,” said my source. “I usually mind my own business but I want to report these people. Hopefully we can send them back where they came from.”

Good luck!

The days of the Deerfield River as a hidden local gem are long gone. I suppose some think that’s a good thing. Not me. I miss the “old” Deerfield River, especially the inaccessible secluded sections, places Trout Unlimited fought and failed to protect. As usual, money talked, entrepreneurs won and the ecosystem is paying the price.